Thursday, December 07, 2006

Christmas Blues?

It's 4:55am on a Thursday morning. 15 degrees outside - and while the calender hasn't announced winter yet, I know it's out there. Lurking and just waiting to catch you unawares.
Darling husband is away on a business trip to San Diego and has been there since this past Monday. Winter doesn't touch San Diego, much to the delight of San Diego residents.

Christmas is 17 days away. I am most pleased to say that with the exception of a two particular items, I am finished with shopping. Only family reads these posts (and then I wonder if I'm fooling myself), so I won't go any further with Christmas details. However, I did go on the great quest for the TREE yesterday after physical therapy (which was my last session - wrist is doing fine, by the way).

The tree was not to be found. It's a simple quest, really. Four feet high and prelit - and of course, green. I remember a time when one did not have to specify the color of the Christmas tree. I could have just as easily brought home a white one - or a red one - or a blue one. All four feet high and prelit. What I do not understand is why merchants stock white, red and blue Christmas trees when these colors are left standing on valuable floor room space year after year and the green trees are snapped up within days of placing them out for sale. Two minutes after Christmas day, these trees can be bought for pennies on the dollar - and then disappear within a day or so, only to be hauled out next year- or returned to the manufacturer. I seriously doubt they're purchased.

The Christmas blues have hit me for some reason. I've counted my blessings - and they are more than ever before....

Work is going very well
I spend time with my sister who is becoming a friend
I can talk to several coworkers at least on a surface level (!)
I have been steadily working on several quilt projects and enjoying it more and more
We moved from a one bedroom apartment to a two bedroom apartment (right next door - amazing!) and the difference in space is a huge blessing
I have made a wonderful friend via the internet
Our children are doing very well - our grandchildren are healthy (and they're the most intelligent children on the planet)
My husband loves me more & more every day (what's more - he verbalizes it daily) - and that feeling is returned

Yet - there's something that I can't quite capture that isn't completing the picture.

Perhaps it's the fact that Christmas is around the corner and this will be the second year we won't be having the children and grandchildren with us on that day. Yes, I know it's a day on the calender that says CHRISTMAS (thank God the calender makers haven't replaced it with the word HOLIDAY - but I see it coming) - but still, there's something to be said about having family gathered on that particular day.

So I will need to continue to listing those blessings - and know I'm not only loved by my husband of thirty-five years plus - but by Jesus. That in itself is far beyond what I deserve.


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